A long complain... Oops

Okay, basically, I'm just probably gonna complain about some stuffs... Haha... Oops.

Last friday, went to a wedding dinner. I won't say which hotel it is here. Well, bad service. It is too obvious that something went wrong with the management. Even the supervisor is sorta like slapping his head in front of the guests... The second dish of the course, shark fin soup, almost all the pepper dispenser(is that the right name?) are not working at all... Next, they are really slow in re-filling the drinks. When they clear the plates, sometimes, they forgot to place another new plate... And some of their plates, are not clean...

And what's worst is their english. Well, kinda weird and funny i guess. Wouldn't have noticed the mistake if it's not for their tone. When they are clearing the plates, they asked, "Are u finished?". Yup, and it's in that kinda not that friendly tone, kinda rude too. Anyway, isn't it supposed to be, "Have u finished?"? Or they can just simply ask, "May I clear ur plate?". Duh...

Next is the washroom, well, no clear signs of where it is, no arrows pointing. And it doesn't cater for non-English educated. There is no logo/ picture at all. Not even at the door of the washroom. There's only the word of "male" and "female" written on the doors and the text size is really small. It's easy to miss it.

Okay, end of complains... It's a pretty long one though... Oops...

Haha... My aunt got my dad a Harley Davidson t-shirt. It looks cool actually, but dad says he's too old for it. Duh...

Well, so, sat and sun, I didn't went out or anything. Argh... kinda bored... Okay, I'm not being a good girl because I've been playing games and not doing my work. Haha... Yup, very bad.

Oh ya, and my cousins from New Zealand is coming to visit real soon! Alright!

And that kinda reminds me. I think there's quite a lot going on on the 20th. Birthday celebrations in that case. And the 21st is the date for my cousins visit.

Watched Bleach movie yesterday. Not bad. The ending's kinda sad though. The concept is sorta like Experimental Lain I guess. Sorta like, "Memories are gone but what's this feeling?" Well, I guess it's probably true that people have 2 types of memories, one is the mind and the other, the body. Haha... Bleh...

I better go do my reel now... So far, I've just complete the head. Probably will do some fine tuning after finishing up most of the parts... Sometimes, it is kinda demoralizing when I'm just not good enuff... Gotta try harder...

Oh, what can I blog about?!

The mooncake festival just ended. Well, there are still celebrations for it, but I guess the full moon's not there anymore.

It's a nice full moon yesterday,16th and it's rounded than lunar 15th. There's a nice rainbow surrounding it. Cool!

Yea... yesterday went to mambo night. Well, end conclusion, i prefer pubbing. Just not too happy yesterday, cause it's boring and the alcohol they served seems kinda tasteless... Well, sorry, but everything just doesn't seems to be good at all, music sucks, it's too overcrowded. Maybe I shouldn't have gone out yesterday.

Okay, I'm probably just weird but I guess I prefer bitter taste. Of course, not too bitter. Like, bitter chocolate, bitter coffee, bitter alcohol. Don't really like things that are too sweet... Oh whatever...

Duh... Grr... I think I'm just down again. I just can't seem to make the eyes of the cyborg look right... looked for references, but their eye shape is different from the start, so, when i try it on, it looks odd...

And there's not much events happening around, nothing much to blog about...

Sometimes, just felt the hatred growing within...

So this is how it goes...

Okay, I just needed time off... So, weekends are pretty great!

Well, Sat, I left home feeling really upset. I guess I kinda could figure it out...

Gotta say, really sorry, was late for an hour meeting my friends for the wushu guan mo hui at the indoor stadium. And, I had a dead/glum/long face. I just didn't feel good at all... So, I didn't talk much and I sorta get a little unhappy when people talk about their job and all that. Yeah... I'm really bad. Can't get my thinking straight.

But in the middle of the performance, I guess I sorta felt better and all that. Then, I started to talk and fool around. And, yeah, it feels much better fooling around rather than having that glum face. It just makes my facial muscle feel unwell.

So, didn't really felt like going home that night. I guess I sorta quarreled with my mum. I didn't really bother to reply or tell my parents where was I and stuff like that. Yeah, bad, I'm being kinda inconsiderate and irresponsible. Went to my friend's house to stay over.

I really love movies somehow. Well, watched 200 pounds beauty all over again and watched the first few episodes of Friends season 1. Nice. In 200 pounds beauty, "just do what u do best, that's enough." Er... Hard. Haha. And Friends, it's funny!

It's really cold at night. No blanket to cover my legs. Haha... cause my friends are using it. Well, luckily, I have my jeans to cover. Kinda weird, I'm wearing shorts and covering my legs with my jeans. And, I'm sleeping sitting on the sofa. I guess I sneezed too much that night, so, my nose kinda blocked. So, lying down is really hard for me to breath, thus, sleeping sitting up.

Honestly, I didn't really sleep much and didn't really feel much like sleeping for the whole night. Okay, so morning. And wow! My friend's mum is really generous! There's like so much food in the morning. I'm bloated.

After that, rushed down back to the west to bake a cake for the birthday girl. It's kinda really late already. So we are all rushing... Quick quick bake the cake. And, it's like, so where should we be meeting them? Kinda fun baking the cake. And I sorta realized something.

I just feel kinda amazed. My mum's kitchen is really very clean. There isn't grease around the cupboards. And, yup, she always make the effort to clean the walls and cupboard every time after she cooked. Well, okay, back to the story.

So, decided to meet at the Mac in West Coast. And, we just had to be there before them. Like, a surprise. "Hey! How come u guys are here?!" There comes the birthday girl. Haha... Yeah... then funny, we are at Mac but we brought our own food as well. Ordered some food from Mac too! And, there are 5 packets of seaweed. It's like, 1 of each flavour... So, there's original, seafood, tomato, wasabi, tom yam. Duh... And Jiao even made red eggs! The cake is pretty okay for the sponge part, but I guess the icing is a bit too watery. Haha... Fun!

Yea, we all had fun. After that, went home. Was pretty tired. Guess I felt better so, did chat with mum. Mum's like saying she's gonna buy a microwave since the supermarket nearby is selling it at a pretty good price.

Okay, so I cooked a packet of noodles and ate it. Haha... I'm kinda bloated though. Just felt like eating... That's after I bath. Ate my noodles and went to sleep. It's like one night in the cold kinda made my skin thicker. Haha... I'm just tired. So off to bed, and woke up this afternoon...

Yep. I guess I just need to take a break occasionally. Well, it sorta does make me miss my creature. So, when that happens it makes me wanna do my work again!

So I can say my current situation... It's really not the usual. I'm not working, and I don't have the money to further my studies. I'm not qualified enough to work. Thus, I'm self-studying, and of course, it may take a longer time. Occasionally, I'll take up some short contract work to keep me alive. Short contract work, will give me a few days/weeks off such that I'll really miss doing my reel. So, that's just it.

I gotta exercise some time too... And, hopefully, tmr I can wake up earlier. Yea, just have to take my time to learn, but not too long and not too fast. Fight on!

i hate this world.

scribbled on the paper. tear it away from my sketch book. tear another of my past sketch from the book. tear them into pieces. throw them around.

i hate this world. i really do.

Not a good feeling... On the verge of craziness...

Darn! And yesterday, I was so hungry that I kept on thinking about food... The moment I woke up today, ate fried rice and there I am again... Sick of food..

Waking up really late... It's just bad. And not exercising... Super bad...

I think I really need a schedule and a plan. It's sorta like, there are a lot of things that I should do and learn, just that it's too much and too messy. Like, one moment I wanna do this, another moment, I should do that.

Argh... Like people say, no plan=failure. Well, bad plan doesn't work as well... Just, gotta do things step by step.

And, I'm sorta sick of my creature, so, I guess I'll give it a little break and meanwhile, learn something else...

Guess my basics still sucks! Darn! Gotta learn more more more! It's just not satisfying... NOT SATISFYING!!!! Grr... Fight on!!!!!

Darn! I don't feel good at all..

Totally lost in time...

Freak! I'm sleeping for so so so long almost everyday.

Even when I thought of sleeping early, I might be able to wake up earlier. Ended up, I slept earlier, but, I woke up later...

Doesn't really feel good with that sleepy feeling all the time.

It's like I suddenly go blank when I sleep. When someone wakes me up, I don't know where I am. Duh...

And, ARGH! It's really bad, I think I might need to take quite along time to finish up with the creature. Damn!

*Breathes in* Don't bother. Don't bother. Don't bother. Don't mind. Don't mind. Don't mind. Phew.....

One of my model...

So far I've only got 1 model for my reel. It's sorta done last year. A creature in the process. Lots of things to learn still, such as making the creature look fierce! And the details and stuff like that... Gotta learn how to paint as well... So much more to learn...

I think it's swollen...

Sunday was really fun! Well, helped Stop Cloud to shift the digital piano to her house... So, we get to sit at the back of the lorry! Whoa! It's so long since the last time I sat at the back of the lorry. And what's more shiok is the big rain! Haha... not really that much a good thing but it's kinda fun to get play with the rain occasionally.

After the piano trip, we went all the way to a fish farm! Kinda cool, there's the fish spa. Well, mum kinda got mad, cause she says the sucker fishes may be capable of spreading other people's diseased skin around. Not that much of a good thing but, just for the sake of experience. And, fed the fishes and went around to look at the fishes for sale and the fish gallery. There's one really poor thing. The fish was kinda born with it's neck snapped downwards, so, it can't really swim around. But it's really alert, as u moved, u can see it's eyes moved, like it's looking at u.

Yea, and Monday went to training. Well, I didn't though. I'm sorta just walking around the school. Sorta wanted to jog, but the nice cooling weather makes me so lazy... Haha.... Kinda fun chit chatting!

Okay, so it's today... dun really feel that good. Had this really bad swollen feeling near my throat... Argh... Feeling a little feverish. But I guess it's sorta all better now.

Well, have been kinda unhappy and depressed for quite some time... can't say that I'm totally cured though. Anger and sadness isn't really good for health. True, but sometimes, I think I just need that to survive. And yea, I don't trust people that easily. But then again, I don't really bother, in the end I do trust people to a certain extend. After all, people can have their own little secrets too! Secrets that they don't wan others to know, or not the right time for others to know. Sorta complicated. But, that's just the way it is eh?

Hmm... I think it's not that I don't trust people. It's just that I don't really wanna depend on others so much. Well, everyone have their own problems after all. So, if certain problems I can solve it, just solve it myself. And, some problems, it should be solved myself. What's so bad about that? Well, of course it doest feels better sometimes to share our problems. I don't know, sometimes sharing these feelings kinda made me feel awkward...

Life's just life. Me is just me. Just see how it goes.